Greeting Cards

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"Greeting Cards"
Ten Years Of Tears cover
Song by Mark Eitzel from the album Ten Years Of Tears
Released 2007
Format CD
Label Self-released
Writer(s) Mark Eitzel
Ten Years Of Tears track listing
  1. "Ladies And Gentlemen" (Undertow Orchestra - Oporto 6.6.6)
  2. "St. Michael My Pet Rat" (Undertow Orchestra - Oporto 6.6.6)
  3. "Sleeping Beauty" (Undertow Orchestra - Oporto 6.6.6)
  4. "Home" (Undertow Orchestra - Park West, Chicago 17.2.6)
  5. "Mission Rock Resort" (Radio 6.96)
  6. "Aspirin" (Radio 6.96)
  7. "In Your Life" (Radio 5.97)
  8. "Greeting Cards" (Solar Culture, Tucson 25.6.1)
  9. "To The Sea" (Solar Culture, Tucson 25.6.1)
  10. "No Easy Way Down" (Solar Culture, Tucson 25.6.1)
  11. "Rehearsals For Retirement" (Amoeba Recs. SF 24.4.2)
  12. "My Father's House" (World Financial Centre – NYC 14.1.6)
  13. "Heart And Soul" (Meteriet, Lund 12.4.6)
  14. "Blue And Grey Shirt" (Fibbers, York 2.6.5)
  15. "I've Been A Mess" (Fibbers, York 2.6.5)
  16. "Jesus' Hands" (Iron Horse, Northampton 23.1.7)

"Greeting Cards" is the 8th song on Mark Eitzel's 2007 limited edition tour CD, Ten Years Of Tears. The song, written in the Autumn of 2000, was a staple in Eitzel's live shows from The Invisible Man period, however this live version is the only version to have been released thus far.


For a living I write greeting cards
I get a bonus for the dumbest rhymes
I specialize in deepest sympathy
But instead of a symphony,
you get this doorbell style chime

And I know it's my lucky day
If I can say all the things you think too stupid to say

You can find my work over on aisle seven
Yes, yes, yes that's the one that's closest to heaven
Where you can also buy aspirin
Screw Magazine and paraffin
And I know that I'm a lucky so-and-so
if I know all the things you think too dumb to know

For a living I write greeting cards
I make painful things seem not so hard
I only cost three dollars 99
It doesn't cost a lot for the stupidly kind